Veterans Day is November 11. Most people mean well. A lot of them also freeze, say something awkward, and walk away wishing they'd said more. Here's how to do it right.
Know which day it is.
Veterans Day honors the service of everyone who wore the uniform. Memorial Day, in May, is for remembering the ones who died in service. The date goes back to the first Armistice Day in 1919. Congress made November 11 a legal holiday in 1938 and renamed it Veterans Day in 1954. So on November 11, saying thank you is exactly right. On Memorial Day, many veterans would rather you skip the "happy" and just acknowledge the day.
Say thanks, then ask a real question.
"Thank you for your service" is fine, and it's meant kindly. What lands better is what comes next. Ask where they served. Ask what their job was. Ask how long they were in. Then listen. A veteran who feels listened to gets a better day out of the holiday than one who gets a handshake and a quick exit.
Leave one thing alone.
Don't ask about combat, or what they saw, or whether they've killed anyone. If they want to tell you, they will. Pushing for it makes the moment about your curiosity.
Do something.
Plenty of veterans say actions mean more than words. Buy from a veteran-owned business. Volunteer at your local VFW, American Legion, or VA. Hire a veteran, or tell your employer to. Give to a veteran organization you've checked out first. Check on the older vet down the street who lives alone. Any of it counts.
Don't make it a one-day thing.
The veterans in your life are still veterans on November 12 and in March. Call in the spring. Send a text on a random Tuesday. Ask how the truck is running. The ones who go quiet are often the ones who need the call most.
If you're the veteran reading this:
You don't owe anyone a story today. Say "thanks" back, change the subject, or stay home if that's what you need. All of that is fine.
An early version of Coach Jeff is in the App Store now. The full app launches November 11 at 11:11 a.m. Eastern. Details at coachjeff.ai.